b3nedikte

carrot callback

calling all dreamersare we there yet?the center is closedand the switchers retiredfor once, you’ll have to stickwith your decisionshang up by the lacesyour running away shoesit’ll be carrot season, nextdisconnect to reconnectcut the wiressnakeing in every cornerwho’s Jack, anyway?and plug in that lightbulb showing you the waywhen the Moon blocks the Sunremember who you arenotContinue reading “carrot callback”

flood warning

the plant in meis drowning in rainwith my doubts floating awayor collecting at the drainof a shower that won’t be minebut the windows are cleani wish i was renovatinginstead of reinventingor living out of a suitcasebut i own a bed nowand yellow rain bootsto waddle in my tearsor my irrational fearsof having to downsizeagain, toContinue reading “flood warning”

banana bread

i keep making banana breadbecause i am faced withfree bananas at workso i bring one homeand enter a cycleof forgetting it in my bagremember, then forget it againuntil they feel neglectedthere’s three of them by nowi would never waste foodbut there’s no patience or faiththat i can make something betterso i make banana breadand getContinue reading “banana bread”

time management

my goal for this yearis to stop timefrom managing meit will pass anywayfirst, my smartwatch brokeand the effort to fix it, againwas just not worth the timeso i escaped, after yearsmy data-driven lifestylei stopped counting stepslost track of my phoneand of course, the timesecond, the WiFi-connected smart ovenshedding light on timewas replaced with a relicthatContinue reading “time management”

part 1: potatoes

i met my very firstlove at first sightat a potato festivalin rural Estoniai might have been 12if you’re reading this, Tõnisthat’s all i rememberHi, I’m Benedikteand this is the beginningof everything that came after youi can’t tell you muchabout what was my childhoodi was too busy overregulatingbut my broken lovelifestarted at around 14and it literallyContinue reading “part 1: potatoes”

dusty contemplations

aren’t we actually to blamefor our most immortal enemydustbeing an issuein the first placewe, humans, as a speciescollectively decidedto inhabit the indoorshave you ever seen dustin the forest, by the sea?i don’t recallor maybe as revengeit wiped my memoryas i wiped it off the windowsillwe trapped ourselvesbetween these four wallswith the same layoutthe same programContinue reading “dusty contemplations”

way of the spring onion

day 4 of my outingfinally someone noticedme working in the shadowsattracting trouble in the lightthat is bugsin the code and on the ceilingtoday i decidedi will see the worldin my sandalsa kilometres long levadatook us far from our groupreplanting regional bananashopping over waterfallsi discovered my fear of heightswalking exposure therapyby a 500m high clifffor longerContinue reading “way of the spring onion”

life with a side of work

what an odd experienceto meet a handful of peoplefor one weekone of them fortwo and a half dayshike together for 4 hoursand then possibly never meet againin this lifetimei already forgoti’ve experienced this beforeit’s been 4 yearsi remember where they came fromsome of their namesless of their jobsbut none of their dreamswe become friendscolleagues andContinue reading “life with a side of work”

push to main

oh no, she has leftthe country againtoo many people have saidthat it’s my rightto act according to my own needsand Portugal is always the answerwhatever the questionas of latearound 27.5 yearsi’ve been branching offsomeone else’s master mainnot saying i’m a slavebut my local branch’s originwas set to whoever was upstreamone step aheadwithout questioning the directionandContinue reading “push to main”

spring breeze

feeling like my spaceis decreasing once morewithout consideringi haven’t brought myself outsidei could hold a dance classon my balcony if onlyit was 15 degrees warmeryet the only ray of springthat has touched my faceis the reading-mode yellowmaking me forgetto see all the beautyC could never show mebut my vacation startedit’s illegal to work next weekIContinue reading “spring breeze”