it took me a month to get a time
for a phone call with local help
explaining once again
why and how i ended up here
this time i felt heard
crying on live telephony
and signed up for the waiting list
of a lot of people who need the help
the up
and then fighting the windmill
it's welfare, not wellfare
who think my previous employer
should make a plan for my bettering
so i poured out the truth
for them to read too
perhaps nothing will change
as the result of the bucket of tears
i poured while writing it
wait which one did i send in?
the down
in my attempt to resist capitalism
fittingly, i got a burner
to get off the perfect lives
i'd try to strive for from the web
until i failed at knowing
when and where the bus goes
and at squatting out the dread
in the gym who can't recognize
the person sweating on all
17 of their security cameras
unless i handshake my BankID
via internet when opening the door
the low
but at home i'm safe
here i have the interwebs
netflix, youtube, instagram
to numb out the fear
that my neighbours are NPCs
never opening the blinds
flipping their pancakes
and only ever coming home
with more eggs and hatred
towards the six cats who are
taking over the neighbourhood
someone has to go outside
they don't know about the spiders
webbing on the balconies
or the bees hitting their windows
because this housing unit
wiped away their home
who are eating their honey inside
on the pancakes with blueberries
from the grocery store, of course
they'd rather binge-watch Love Island
and melt into one with the couch
than find the one or an island
with blueberries, in season
get out there or they'll be gone
too slow
Inspiratsiookean 